Preaching to a bear. A Catholic Priest, a Baptist Preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains to the students of Northern Michigan University at Marquette in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.
They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn’t really all that hard, a real challenge would be to preach to a bear.
One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment.
They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it to their religion.
Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences.
Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had various bandages on his body and limbs, went first.
‘Well,’ he said, ‘I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism.
Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around.
So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb.
The Bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation.’
Reverend Billy Bob the Baptist spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip.
In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, ‘WELL, brothers, you know that we Baptists don’t sprinkle!
I went out and I found me a bear.
And then I began to read to my bear from God’s HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me.
So I took hold of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek.
So I quickly dunked him and baptized his hairy soul.
And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus. Hallelujah!
The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed.
He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors running in and out of him.
He was in really bad shape.
The Rabbi looked up and said: “Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start.”
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Questo articolo narra la storia di tre uomini di Chiesa e un orso, animale molto conosciuto anche nella Val di Rabbi, in cui si è acceso recentemente un dibattito sull’eticità riguardo alla sua uccisione da parte di imprenditori agricoli della zona, che si sono sentiti minacciati dall’animale, che ripetutamente distrugge i raccolti della valle.